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††† My Thoughts on Step Nine



"Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others."


Being responsible for the damage I did it was necessary to clear the wreckage of my past so I could really let go of the past and move on to my new way of life booze free Step nine was one of the most difficult to do fear of the unknown was always there


It's one thing to make a list of the people I hurt as I did in Step eight that was painful But to go to those people in person and actually admit what I did and ask for forgiveness that just scared the hell out of me then to try to make it right with my apology and asking for forgiveness


Never mind some of the restitution I need to make for stiffing some of my creditors It was tempting to skimp on this step but I thought that with everyone of them some of the people I harmed didn't I actually realize I had cause problems for them


I still needed to make those amends anything that bothered me was an amend to make There were times I could not apologize because to do so would cause more harm My sponsor was a big help he showed me the right way to go in these matters of harms


Making direct amends could be a letter a phone call or going around to see them some letters went out some phone calls were made some amends could not be made but most of my amends were made at a personal level it was the best way for me


My sponsor helped me to be honest as to who the amends would hurt its not about me If I did not know how to reach some there was not much I could do but stay willing for me it was important to get this done as soon as possible and doing it right


I had to get the bulk of my amends done as soon as possible with out hurting anyone my Family my friends my co-workers creditors were the first and easiest for me confronting and making amends for my mistakes freed me form that bondage of myself


God was with me every step of the way I thank Him and my sponsor for the strength to take these action in steps four thru nine it really set me free to start practicing all the steps in my daily life and to be free to try to give some of this I have learned back to others


People I sponsor today I tell them not to confess to the loved one about any affairs As that could really hurt loved ones So the key there is willingness to make amends that means that if I could go back and change what had happened I would I became willing


I tell them not to put their jobs in danger by telling the boss they have been stealing if you told a friend you had an affair with his wife that would drag her into your guilt hurting her so in some cases just become willing why confess to something that could get you put in jail


You can do more good passing on the 12 steps than being stuck behind prison bars Donít let your amends be at the cost of other people's security dignity and well being In short say your sorry or like me it was also to ask for forgiveness and give forgiveness If you can


If you cant go to someone just become willing to make the amends we are not perfect just try to be as honest and as humble as you can be try a change of attitude and a change of heart doing Gods will that is what it is about


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